Before we boarded the Polar Express, we didn't know much about the story. We'd never seen the movie, and although we own the book, it only came out at Christmastime, and wasn't nearly as popular as The Nutcracker or How The Grinch Stole Christmas.
For this ride, we were focused on the magic of belief and wonder - we were after all, traveling from Buzzard's Bay direct to the North Pole in less than an hour! What we discovered, though, was something even more beautiful: Compassion.
The hobo who features prominently in Polar Express became the pivotal character in our adventure. More interesting, even, than Santa and his elves.
Before taking our tickets, the Conductor told us to be on the lookout for this hobo, and to be able to provide him with details about the hobo's looks and whereabouts. Was the Conductor trying to help us empathize with this man who was so clearly down on his luck? No, it became clear - the Conductor wanted to catch him and reprimand him for not having a ticket.
The hobo was dirty from head to toe. His clothes were tattered - tape held his coat together, while patches covered the holes in his jeans. With a handkerchief sack tied to a stick and slung over his shoulder, he was quite a sad sight walking through the train.
After being caught, the hobo sat far from everyone else - alone. Until Isabelle insisted on going to talk with him. If he needed a ticket, maybe she could get him one for Christmas. And she had lots of questions: Do you live on the train? (I am trying to) Were you on the roof of the train? (Yes) Where were you living before you got on the train? (In the woods) Are you able to eat? (Sometimes) Where were you living before living in the woods? (With my mother) Where does your mother live? (Boston)
Later, he told us: When she writes her book, I want to read it.
When you ask most parents what they want for their children, the answer is often - happiness. But how exactly is happiness achieved? And what kind of guidebook are we as parents supposed to provide for attaining it?
I recently read the Dalai Lama's book, Beyond Religion, in which he talks about the kind of happiness that comes from empathy and compassion.
Empathizing with someone in distress, he writes, shows courage, and courage imparts confidence.
It is through giving warmth and affection, through being genuinely concerned for others - in other words, through compassion - that we gain the conditions for genuine happiness. For this reason, loving is of even greater importance than being loved.
The Dalai Lama continues, When compassion, or warmheartedness, arises in us and shifts our focus away from our own narrow self-interest, it is as if we open an inner door. Compassion reduces fear, boosts our confidence, and brings us inner strength. By reducing distrust, it opens us to others and brings a sense of connection with them and a sense of purpose and meaning in life. Compassion also gives us respite from our own difficulties.
If in the film, the hobo represents doubt of the Christmas spirit, on our train he came to epitomize the Christmas spirit.
Compassion, the Dalai Lama writes, means wanting to do something to relieve the hardships of others, and this desire to help, far from dragging us further into suffering ourselves, actually gives us energy and a sense of purpose and direction.
I like the direction Isabelle is heading, and the sense of purpose that moved her to the back of the train to reach out to - not an actor - but an impoverished elderly man who was alone at Christmas.
